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Athletics jokes


1. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 now & we don’t know where the heck she is.

2. The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

3. I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven’t lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

4. I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.

5. I don’t exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up our body.

6. I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

7. I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

8. The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

9. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

10. I don’t jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

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Joke #127197 posted in the category: Athletics jokes.

Q. What do runners do when they forget something?
Roll over for answer

They jog their memory
Q. If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do astronauts get?
Roll over for answer

Missile Toe!

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Joke #127198 posted in the category: Athletics jokes.

These are some questions from an actual real-life exam for a 7th grade

athletics class:

FOOTBALL

1. How many yards do you have to get for a 1st down when it’s 1st and 10?

2. How many players are on the field at one time?

4. How many points do you recieve for a touchdown?

5. How many points do you recieve for an extra point kick?

6. How many points do you recieve for an extra point that you run or pass

in?

7. How many points do you recieve for a safety?

8. What is it called when an offensive player jumps offsides before the

ball is snapped?

9. Which player recieves the ball from the center?

10. What piece of equipment protects your sholders?

BASKETBALL

1. How many points do you recieve for a lay-up?

2. How many points do you recieve for a free-throw?

3. How many points do you recieve for a three-pointer?

4. How many players are on the court at one time?

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Joke #127199 posted in the category: Athletics jokes.

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