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Why do cows have bells?

Because their horns don’t work.

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Joke #1683 posted in the category: Bad jokes.

These Two Criminals Had Just Escaped From Prison And Were On The Run From The Fbi. They Came To A Desert Crossing Which Required Camels In Which To Cross. There Was A Camel Renter There Renting Camels, So They Both Rented The Fastest Camels Available And Were On There Way Across The Desert As Fast As They Could.

soon The Fbi Agent Trailing Them Got To The Camel Renter And Asked About The Fugitives Of Which The Camel Renter Identified Them. The Agent Then Requested To Rent A Camel, But To His Dismay The Camel Renter Told Him He Had Rented The Last Two Camels To The Fugitives.

the Agent Was Pissed, As He Looked Around In Dismay He Spotted A Healthy Looking Camel In A Corral All By Himself, So He Asked About That Camel. The Came Renter Told Him That That Camel Was Not Rentable And Refused To Negotiate. The Agent Insisted And Persisted Until The Camel Renter Told Him That The Only Way The Camel Would Run Was That He Would Have To Jack Him Off To Get Him Going And Again Every Time The Camel Stopped Running. The Agent Said Hey Fukit I’ll Take Him. So He Jacked Off The Camel And Off He Went, A Few Hours Through The Desert The Camel Stops, So The Agent Gets Down, Jacks The Camel Off And Away He Goes, A Few Hours Later The Same, Then Again And Again. Soon Up Ahead He Can See That He’s Gaining Ground On The Convicts And He Is Real Happy. As He Gets 25 Yards From Them The Camel Stops Again, He Jumps Off The Camel All Pissed Off And Frustrated, Jacked Off The Camel And Jumps Back On Him, But The Camel Does Not Go, So He Jumps Back Off, Jacks Him Off Again, Jumps On The Camel, But The Camel Again Would Not Go. After A Few More Tries The Camel Refuses To Go, So He Gets In Front Of The Camel And Says ”you Son Of A Bitch I Done Jacked You Off Plenty Of Times And Closed His Fist And Hit The Camel On The Nose Real Hard And Said Why The Fuck Won’t You Run”?

the Camel Looked Him In The Eye Shook His Head And Pointed Towards His Mouth.

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Joke #3025 posted in the category: Bad jokes.

How Do You Make An Eggrole?

you Push It!

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Joke #3559 posted in the category: Bad jokes.

Q: What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A: It’s cute but can you pick up peanuts with it?

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Joke #4334 posted in the category: Bad jokes.

Q: Why Did The Monkey Eat The Banana?
A: Because He Found It A-peel-ing!!

Q: How Do You Make A Monkey Eat An Orange?
A: Tell Him Its A Banana!!!

Q: When Do You Need A Monkey?
A: When You Need To Open A Mondoor!!

Q: How Many Monkeys Does It Take To Change A Lightbulb?
A: Only One Coz They Have Opposable Thumbs So Theoretically Its Possible. Plus If You Had More Than One Monkey Hed Probably Get Sidetracked With The Other Monkeys And The Lightbulb Wouldnt Get Changed.

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Joke #5505 posted in the category: Bad jokes.

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