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Business and Work jokes


What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?

Lickalotapus

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Joke #139 posted in the category: Business and Work jokes.

Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked and burglarized. She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime. The police dispatcher broadcast the call and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond.

As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.

Putting her face in her hands, she moaned: ”I come home to find all my possessions stolen. I call the police for help, and what do they do? They send me a BLIND policeman!”

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Joke #160 posted in the category: Business and Work jokes.

The sky was dark

The moon was high

All alone

Just her and I

Her hair so soft

Her eyes so blue

I knew just what

She wanted to do

Her skin so soft

Her legs so fine

I ran my fingers

Down her spine

I didn’t know how

But I tried my best

To place my hand

On her breasts

I remember my fear

My fast beating heart

But slowly she spread

Her legs apart

And when she did it

I felt no shame

All at once

The white stuff came

At last it’s finished

It’s all over now

My first time

Milking a cow!

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Joke #719 posted in the category: Business and Work jokes.

The manager hired a new secretary. She was young, sweet and polite. One day while taking dictation, she noticed his fly was open. While leaving the room, she courteously said, ’Oh, sir, did you know that your barracks door is open?’

He did not understand her remark, but later on he happened to look down and saw that his zipper was open. He decided to have some fun with his new employee.

Calling her in, he asked, ’By the way, Miss Jones, when you saw my barracks door open this morning, did you also see a soldier standing at attention?’

The secretary, who was quite witty, replied, ’Why, no sir. all I saw was a little, disabled veteran, sitting on two duffel bags!’

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Joke #729 posted in the category: Business and Work jokes.

A crusty old man walks into a bank and says to the teller at the window, ”I want to open a damn checking account.” To which the astonished woman replies, ”I beg your pardon, sir; I must have misunderstood you. What did you say?”

”Listen up, damn it. I said I want to open a damn checking account right now!”

”I’m very sorry sir, but we do not tolerate that kind of language in this bank.”

So saying, the teller leaves the window and goes over to the bank manager to tell him about her situation. They both return and the manager asks the old geezer, ”What seems to be the problem here?”

”There’s no friggin problem, dammit!” the man says, ”I just won $50 million bucks in the damn lottery and I want to open a damn checking account in this damn bank!”

”I see,” says the manager, ”and this bitch is giving you a hard time?”

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Joke #795 posted in the category: Business and Work jokes.

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