Birds And Bees
A father asked his 10 year old son if he knew about the birds and the bees.
”I don’t want to know!” the child said, bursting into tears. ”Promise me you won’t tell me.”
Confused, the father asked what was wrong.
”Oh dad,” the boy sobbed, ”when I was 6 I got the there’s no Santa speech. At 7, I got the there’s no Easter Bunny speech. When I Was 8, you hit me with the there’s no tooth fairy speech. If you tell me that grown-ups don’t really do it, I’ll have nothing left to live for.”
A man was blissfully driving along the highway when he saw the Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place. Candy, too. The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road and got out to see what had become of the bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful bunny was dead. The driver felt guilty and began to cry. A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong. ”I feel terrible,” he explained. ”I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?”The woman told the man not to worry. She said she knew exactly what to do. She went to her car trunk and pulled out a spray can. Then she walked over to the limp, dead bunny and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the firry little animal. Miraculously, the Easter Bunny came back to life, jumped up, gathered the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped on down the road. Fifty yards away, the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards. Then he turned, waved, hopped another 50 yards, turned and waved again. The man was astonished. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what could have been in that woman’s spray can. So he asked her: ”What in heaven’s name is in your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?”The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: ”Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave.”-0+