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Haryanvi jokes


Teli aur jat ki is baat pe kaha suni ho gayi ke kaun ghana syana se. Dona ke beech shayari ka muqabla ho gaya. Pehelan teli ki baari thi. Usne sunaya, ”Jat re jat, tere sar pe khat.”

Jat ne apna dimag top gear main thok diya aur bolya, ”Teli re teli, tere sir pe kohlu.”

Teli bolya, ”Arre jat ya to koi baat nahi bani.”

Jat bolya, ”Na banne, sasurre bojh taley to dab ke marega.”

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Joke #34994 posted in the category: Haryanvi jokes.

Ek pheri nu hoya ke ek cycle walle ne ek budhiya mein cycle bhida di.

Budhiya bolli,

”Re oot tu itni badi badi mooch ley rya se, tanne sharam ni aundhi mere takkar mar di?”

Cycle walla chora bolya,

”Kyun tai moochhan mein ke brake laag ri se?”

-7+

Joke #34995 posted in the category: Haryanvi jokes.

A Haryanavi peasant came to the office of The Hindustan Times to place an advertisement announcing his father’s death.

”The rate is Rs. 360 per single col. cm,” the clerk told him.

”Main to lut jaoonga - I ’ll be ruined,” exclaimed the Haryanvi.

”My father was 182 cms tall.

-2+

Joke #34996 posted in the category: Haryanvi jokes.

A sophisticated city person comes to Haryana. He has this mistaken notion that rural people are simple and can be made fools of easily. He asks lift from a Sikh farmer on bullock cart, saying ”O paaji, sanu Singapore jana hega, twadi belgaddi le chalugi menu otthon?”

Farmer says, ”Oye aaja, be jaa”.

Hearing this, the city person is momentarily shocked and asks ”Ketthon beyaan?”

The farmer replies, ”Ae majh diyan donaa singhaan utte be jaa, appe hi Singapore ponch javega!!”

-5+

Joke #34997 posted in the category: Haryanvi jokes.

Akhbaar wala ek haryanavi filmon ke hero ka interview leve tha. Uste poochan lagya,

”Jungle mein thaare aage sher aaje to tum ke karoge?”

Hero bolya,

”Arre manne ke karna se, pher to jo bhi karega woh to susra sher he karega!”

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Ek mota sa seth ka chhora doosre chhore ke uppar chaddha bethya aur usney dhad dhad chhetan lag raya aur saath mein jor jor sey ron lagryatha. Rah chalde admi ne bujya,

”Re seth chhetan to tu isney lagrya pher rovey kyun hai?”

Seth bolya, ”Main is khattar ron lagrya ke jeeb main uthunga to pher ke hovega.”

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Mandir mein ek aadmi, Ram ki moorti ke aage jor jor se ron laag rya tha. Saath khade Tau ne poochya, ”Re bhai ke baat se, kyon itta rove se?”

Voh aadmi bolya ”Meri lugai ghar chhod ke bhaaj gayi.”

Tau bolya, ”To bawli booch iske aage ke tesu bahan lag rya. Iski to khud kho gii thi, Hanuman ke pass ja, wohe toh ke laya tha!”

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Ek baar ek shayri sunan lagya, ”Tum uss chilmen sai jahanko, tum uss chilmen sai jhanko, tum uss chilmen sai, jahanko”

Ek bola, ”Aagai”

Shayar faer bola, ”Tum iss chilmen sai jhanko, mein iss chilmen sai jhankoon, tum uss chilmen sai jhanko mein iss chilmen sai jhankoon”

Pachai bathaya aadme dukhi ho leya, ar bola ke, ”La duo aag iss chilmen main, naa tum jhanko na mein jahankoo!”

-17+

Joke #34998 posted in the category: Haryanvi jokes.

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