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There was a couple married for quite some time and they had a boy of 5-6 years old. Their relationship was turning sour.

So finally it reached such a stage that they thought it was better for them to be divorced than carry on such a relationship.

So they consulted a lawyer. But

the big question was who would have the kid. In the hearing in the court. It was decided that this choice should be left on the kid. So the judge asked ”Son, would you like to stay with your mummy?”

Kid said,” No, mummy beats me”: (( So the judge asked ”Then, would you like to stay with your papa then?” Kid said, ”No, papa beats me”: (( Now the judge was in a dilemma and was not able to decide what to do... after pondering for some time he smiled with the ideas he had in his mind about the child......

And he gave the judgment that the kid would stay with......

any guesses????????

ok here goes the answer

The kid would stay with the

”Indian Cricket Team” because they

NEVER BEAT ANY BODY!!

Hoo haa India....!!!! aaya India!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Joke #23608 posted in the category: Indian Cricket jokes.

1) Declaring the winner: If Pakistan bats first and scores x runs then the target for India will be revised to x/2. They need to score (x/2)+1 runs to be declared winner. If India bats first then the number of overs

for Pakistan will be reduced to 25. Even after these modifications India contrive to lose, they will be awarded psychological victory.

2) Fielding restrictions: When India is fielding, as soon as any fielder touches the ball, it will be deemed as dead ball and Pakistan batsmen will only be allowed to complete that run. This modification is being done to eliminate time being wasted for overthrows etc.

3) By popular demand from Indian players, a few additional coaches have been included in the touring party with immediate effect. They are,

Batting coach: Ravi Shastri

Bowling Coach(with experience in Sharjah conditions): Chetan Sharma

Fielding Coach: Ravi Shastri(Dual responsibility)

TV Commercials Coach: Salman Khan

Video Coach: Name will be announced later

4) As the deadline to submit final 15 players for the 1999 World Cup is over, the result of the match on 18th April between 1983 Indian team and the current team will not have any bearing on the team going to England.

Any other suggestions are welcome. We at the ICC would like to ascertain again our commitment to spread the game of cricket globally, from Mozambique to Maldives and from Turkmenistan to Tibet.

Thanking You.

Yours Sincerely,

Jagmohan Dalmiya

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Joke #23657 posted in the category: Indian Cricket jokes.

What is the height of optimism?

Ganguly coming out to bat applying sunscreen on his face.

What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?

The entire Indian Innings.

Where do Indian batsmen perform there best?

In Advertisements.

When would ganguly have 100 runs against his name?

When he is bowling.

You can read other jokes by clicking on the menu on your left.

What is Ganguly’s favorite movie?

Gone in 60 seconds.

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Joke #23712 posted in the category: Indian Cricket jokes.

I have nothing agianst the Indian cricket team, and at the moment they are not playing too bad. I found these jokes on page posted by an Indian supporter!
One Liners

What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?

The entire Indian Innings.

Where do Indian batsmen perform the best?

In Advertisements.

When would Agarkar have 100 runs against his name?

When he is bowling.

What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Indian batsmen?

The walk back to the pavilion.

How do you increase the chances of the Indian batsmen playing out the entire 50 overs?

Try giving them two innings to begin with, then try three and so on.

What is the Indian version of a hat-trick?

3 runs in 3 balls

What is the height of optimism?

Sehwag coming out to bat applying sunscreen on his face.

-------------------

Phone Call for Sehwag:

Indian Team Manager(over Phone): ”Hello”

Sehwag’s Wife: ”Can I talk to Sehwag, this is his wife.”

Indian Team Manager: ”Sorry, he is just gone out to bat”

Sehwag’s Wife: ”No Problem Manager, I will Hold on”

-------------------

DIVORCE COURT SCENE:

The Judge (J. ) asks the little girl (LG):

Now that your parents are getting divorced do you want to live with your mommy?

LG - No, my mommy beats me.

J. - Well then, I guess you want to live with your daddy.

LG - No, my daddy beats me too.

J. - Well then, who do you want to live with?

LG - I want to live with the Indian Cricket team, they never beat anybody!!!!

-------------------

SEHWAG’s SON: Mummy mummy!! dekho papa six pe six mar rahe hain (Mummy mummy!! Look! Daddy is hitting six after six )

SEHWAG’s WIFE: Beta theek se dekho, advertisement hoga ( Come on, son…. that must be an advertisement)

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Joke #23713 posted in the category: Indian Cricket jokes.

At the start of the Indian innings(280 required for a win),

Ganguly to Sachin ”I am not comfortable with Akhtar’s pace. So I

will attack Akram and u take care of Akhtar.”

After 4 overs(with hardly any runs on the board),

Sachin to Ganguly ”These guys are bowling very fast. We will see

them off and then attack Mahmood and Saqlain.”

After 13 overs(when Azhar Mahmood and Saqlain were bowling),

Ganguly to Dravid ”I don’t think we can score off these guys as

well. We will wait for Arshad Khan and Shahid Afridi. Surely we can easily

attack them. After all, Shahid Afridi is a part-time bowler.”

After Afridi bowled some overs,

Dravid to Dhoni ”Don’t worry, Dhoni, I heard that England bowlers are easier to score off. We will play out 50 overs and attack in the next match.”

At the end of the match,

Joshi to Mongia ”Why didn’t u try to force the pace?”

Mongia to Joshi ”No, yaar. If I try to force the pace against these

bowlers, I will get out. There is only one way by which I can score runs fastly without getting out.”

Joshi to Mongia ”What is it?”

Mongia to Joshi ” You have to bowl to me.”

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Joke #35008 posted in the category: Indian Cricket jokes.

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