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Big Lorenzo, an Italian fella, is bragging to his friends about his sons:
”I’ma so prouda my oldest son. He maka fifty thousand dollar evra year. Hesa Engineer!”

”I even more prouda ma second son. He maka five hundred thousand dollar a year. Hesa Doctor!”

”But, I’ma da proudest a ma youngest son. He maka Five million dollar a year. Hesa Sports Mechanic!”

Paolo, his friend asks: ”What’s a Sports Mechanic?”

Lorenzo replies: ”Wella, he can fixa everytin. He fixa da horseraces, he fixa da boxin matcha.......”

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Joke #251 posted in the category: Italian jokes.

A Man Goes Into His Favourite Italian Restaurant And Orders A Meal. he Says To The Waiter,, ’ By The Way, how Do You Prepare Your Chicken? ’

the Waiter Replies, ’ We Don’t, we Just Tell Them Straight That They Are Going To Be Killed.’

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Joke #3479 posted in the category: Italian jokes.

A Couple Were Walking Down The Road When They Passed An Italian Organ Grinder And His Monkey. the Woman Stopped And Handed The Monkey A 20 Euro Note.

’ Why Did You Do That,’ Said Her Husband, ’ I Thought You Hated Italians.’

’ Yes I Do, but They Are So Cute When They Are Little. ’

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Joke #5470 posted in the category: Italian jokes.

One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to God, ”Lord, I have a problem!” ”What’s the problem, Eve?” ”Lord, I know you`ve created me and have provided this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedy snake, but I’m just not happy.” ”Why is that, Eve?” came the reply from above. ”Lord, I am lonely. And I’m sick to death of apples.” ”Well, Eve, in that case, I have a solution. I shall create a man for you.” ”What’s a `man`, Lord?” ”This man will be a flawed creature, with aggressive tendencies, an enormous ego and an inability to empathize or listen to you properly. All in all, he`ll give you a hard time. But, he`ll be bigger and faster and more muscular than you. He`ll be really good at fighting and kicking a ball about and hunting fleet-footed ruminants, and not altogether bad in the sack.” ”Sounds great,” says Eve, with an ironically raised eyebrow. ”Yeah, well. He’s better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick. But, you can have him on one condition.” ”What’s that, Lord?” ”You`ll have to let him believe that I made him first.”

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Joke #6372 posted in the category: Italian jokes.

how do italian women hold there liquer? by the ears.....

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Joke #7875 posted in the category: Italian jokes.

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