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Jokes about animal


Q. Why did the farmer sell his frog leg ranch?
A. He found out it was a ’rough toad to hoe.’

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Joke #6 posted in the category: Jokes about animal.

A farmer rears 25 young hens and one old cock. As the old cock could no longer handle his job efficiently, the farmer buys one young cock from the market and puts it in the pen with the old cock and the hens...

Old Cock: Welcome to the farm. We’ll work together towards productivity.

Young Cock: Whattya mean? As far as I know, you are old and should be retired.

Old Cock: Young boy, there are 25 hens here, can’t I help you with some?

Young Cock: No! Not even one, all of them will be mine.

Old Cock: In this case, I challenge you to a competition and, if I win, you let me have one hen. If I lose you have them all.

Young Cock: Okay. What kind of competition?

Old Cock: 50-yard dash. From here to that tree. But due to my age, I hope you allow me to start off the first 10 yards. Young Cock: No problem! We race tomorrow morning.

Confidently, the following morning, the Young Cock allows the Old Cock to start off and when the Old Cock crosses the 10-yard mark, the young cock chases him with all his might. He was right behind the old cock in a matter of seconds and -- BANG! Before he can overtake the old cock, he is shot dead by the farmer, who sighs and says, ”Damn. That’s the fifth gay chicken I bought this week.”

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Joke #7 posted in the category: Jokes about animal.

Q. What did the doe say when she came running out of the woods?
A. I’ll never do that for two bucks again.

Q. What do you get when you cross a centipede with a turkey?
A. Drumsticks for everybody!

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Joke #8 posted in the category: Jokes about animal.

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80, 000. 00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.

A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

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Joke #9 posted in the category: Jokes about animal.

Bob was excited about his new 338 rifle and decided to try bear hunting.

He traveled up to Alaska, spotted a small brown bear and shot it. Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear.

The black bear said, ”That was a very bad mistake. That bear was my cousin. I’m going to give you two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have sex.” After considering briefly, Bob decided to accept the latter alternative.

So the black bear had his way with Bob. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Bob soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip to Alaska where he found the black bear and shot it dead. Right after, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him.

The grizzly said, ”That was a big mistake, Bob. That bear was my cousin and you’ve got two choices: Either I maul you to death or we have rough sex.”

Again, Bob thought it was better to cooperate with the grizzly bear than be mauled to death. So the grizzly had his way with Bob. Although he survived, it took several months before Bob fully recovered

Now Bob was completely outraged, so he headed back to Alaska and managed to track down the grizzly bear and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then, moments later, there was a tap on his shoulder.

He turned around to find giant polar bear standing there.

The polar bear looked at him and said, ”Admit it Bob, you don’t come here for the hunting, do you?

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Joke #10 posted in the category: Jokes about animal.

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