Funny jokes for every day
A man walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. The barman looks at the creature and asks the man what he calls it.-0+
”Tiny” replies the man.
”Why’s that?” asks the bartender.
”Because he’s my newt!”
Woman goes into a butcher’s...-0+
”I’d like an oxtail please”.
”Certainly”, replies the butcher, ”Once there was an ox...”
A young man was out walking his dog in the park, when a beautiful young woman stopped to admire the animal.-0+
”What’s your dog’s name?” she asked flirtatiously.
”Herpes,” replied the dog’s owner.
”How odd!” exclaimed the woman. ”Why in the world did you name your dog Herpes?”
The young man replied, ”Because he just won’t heel.”
Q. Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?-0+
A. Because they dropped out of school!
What’s better than winning the gold medal at the special olympics?--1+
Not being retarded!
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