A French Table Tennis team travel to the USA to
participate in a tournament in the South. During their
stay, they will be lodged in the dorms of a very
traditional, conservative southern university. Upon
their arrival, the local coordinator, a traditional,
conservative southener announces:
”The female dorms will be out-of-bounds for all
male players, and the male dormitory to the female
players. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be
fined $20 the first time.”
He continued, ”Anybody caught breaking this rule
the second time will be fined $60. Being caught a
third time will cost you a fine of $180. Are there any questions?”
At this point, a French player in the group inquired:
”How much for a weekly pass?”
Q: How many ping pong players does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Four. One to complain that it’s ”table tennis” not ”ping pong”, one to change the lightbulb, one to protest about the type of glue he used to fix the lightbulb into place, and one to get out his copy of the ”Bats ’R’ Us” catalogue and point out that he could have bought an even better one for 50p less.
In a European tournament, three English players
discovered that they all had to play against a
terrific Irish player. When called to the table,
the first English player said he was going to
make him mad, so that he would lose concentration
and play a bad game. He walked over to the Irish
man, shook hands and said:
’Hey, I hear your St. Patrick was a sissy.’
’Oh really, hmm, didn’t know that.’
The game started and the Irish destroyed the first
English player.
Puzzled, the English player walked back to his
buddies.
’I told him St. Patrick was a sissy and he didn’t
care!’
’You just don’t know how to set him off, watch and
learn.’
Later in the tournament, the second English player
had to play the Irish. He walked over, shook hands,
and said:
’I hear your St. Patrick was a transvestite!’
’Oh, wow, I didn’t know that, thank you.’
The game started and the Irish swept the floor
with the second English player.
Shocked beyond belief, the English player went
back to his buddies.
’You’re right, he is unshakable!’
The third English player said: ’No, no, no, I will
really make him lose his temper, you just watch.’
When his turn came, the third English player walked
over to the Irish man, shook hands, and said...
’I hear your St. Patrick was an Englishman!’
’Yeah, thats what your buddies were trying to tell me.’